Friday, January 15, 2010

Four weeks ago

we said goodbye to our baby boy. It seems like it was just yesterday. Sometimes I go a day or two without crying. Today though, I sit and cry. Sometimes I cling to the grief because it's all I have left of him. I miss him. I long for what would have been and the memories we never got a chance to make. I miss feeling him move inside me. I'm sad that I never got to hold his warm body in my arms. To hear his first cry. To introduce him to his big brother and big sister, our family and friends. I just plain miss him and all that could have been. Right now, I wish every visit to the bathroom were not a reminder of our pain.

A couple songs that speak to my heart:
Watermark- Glory baby
Steven Curtis Chapman- Heaven is the Face

9 comments:

joy said...

I am so sorry, Katie. I know this time is difficult. I will pray for you as you continue to grieve the loss of your baby boy.

Mrs.Oz said...

I can hear your tender heart. I'm continuing to lift you before the Father.

Kristen Borland said...

oh katy. so honest and so true. you WILL see him again. i'm so sorry for your pain.

MamaC said...

I wish that I could be there in person to hold your hand and cry with you, Katy. Please know that I am sharing your tears. Thank you for sharing the beautiful songs. I can relate to them all too well - we would have been celebrating our angel baby's 3rd birthday next week. I pray that God soon brings you a deeper sense of peace and an end to the constant reminder. You are in my heart, my thoughts, and my prayers. Love to you, Courtney

Kathy said...

I am so sorry Kimberly. I am so glad you are mourning now instead of stuffing it away. You need to mourn for your baby and all the dreams and plans you had for him. I dont understand why he is gone..I do know that someday it will all make some sort of sense and He will wipe away every tear. I'm praying for you.

I have another song for your grief...A Sad Face by The Choir. Its wonderful BUT very 90's:) I'll email you the lyrics:)

mummyof6monsters said...

sending you much *love* and *hugs* we never forget our angel babies xxx

Jaime said...

Time heals many wounds. The longing for your precious boy will never go away, but slowly, it will be less painful. He is wrapped in the arms of our Savior, and you will see him again. Big Hugs Katy! Love you much.

Corinne Doughan said...

It's been 4 weeks! Unbelievable! I'm praying for you too Katy ... that you would have the freedom to mourn as God would have you mourn and that He would comfort you and bring you peace even in the midst of your tears and heartache. ♥♥

Brianna Heldt said...

Katy I am so terribly sorry. My heart hurts so much for your family. I will be praying for you guys.

 
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